#365yoga Day 32: OUTTA CONTROL!

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This is what it looks like outside my window right now:

It’s a blizzard.  A literal blizzard.  National Weather Service has declared it a blizzard and, for once, they got it right.  We’re looking at possibly 24″ of snow and when the blizzard winds hit, drifts of 4′ are expected.  Everything closed down yesterday and today and, most likely, tomorrow and maybe Thursday because IT IS A BLIZZARD and you’d have to be totally foolish to go anywhere.

Guess who married a totally foolish guy?  This gal.

I knew he was going to go.  I was pissed about it last night.  First of all, I selfishly wanted him home because snow days are more fun with him around.  More importantly, though, I was (and still am) scared to death of him feeling invincible in that big ass truck he has and, oh I don’t know, dying on the roads or getting stranded at work for days on end and looking like this:

He got up this morning, bundled up, and took off.  He’s still gone.  We’ve had over 4″ of snow arrive in less than 4 hours an it’s getting worse by the second.

This is how I look right now:

 

But what can I do?  Nothing.  There’s nothing anyone can do about anyone else or anything else.  We cannot control our environment, other people, or really just about anything other than ourselves.

I don’t really like being a snarly she-beast.  I’m good at it, alright, but I don’t like it,so I’m going to change it.  Today my yoga is all about just breathing and letting go of the illusion of control.  Nothing I can say or do is going to change the situation.  The snow is going to continue falling.  My husband is going to continue doing his thing.  I cannot control that, but I can control my breath.  My focus.  My intention. My attitude.  At least I can try.  With breath and surrender and acceptance, I can work on myself and maybe, just maybe, I’ll begin to look like this:

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One response »

  1. REDRUM!!! I’m laughing out loud. My spouse has braved the streets as well – all to get a playmate for the only child. Just so you feel better, the eagle has landed. In a VW van, no less.

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